Late Night Mumbling

For some reason, tonight was the night to look up the past and forget about the present and future. Why? I honestly don't know. However, looking through the past, I have seen that they move on. They have moved on. So why is it that I can't do the same? Making oneself feel wretched is not a way to a healthy life. I have experienced that first hand.

People will leave you. People will hurt you. People will betray you. These are the thoughts that currently run through my head. I have had so many experiences and yet, this is what surfaces. I want to believe in the better of people...so why can't I believe in myself? Why do I feel like I am the only one that's not moving forward? Maybe because...I'm not. I'm stuck in a rut and I don't know how to get out of it. How long will this plague me?

Sighs. My late night thoughts have taken a hold of me tonight. It's time for me to turn in. Let's hope that tomorrow is truly another day.

Too Much Curiosity

They say social media is a fast way for someone to drop their self esteem. I think it's rather true. It's a place for the comparison and yet, we still rely on it like no other.

Sure, there are some obvious benefits to this, like keeping up with friends and family and reconnecting with the old. However do the benefits outweigh the negatives? This I'm not too sure of.

I've always been a curious soul, always following things that I find interesting. Really though, sometimes it gets me into quite a bit of trouble. Perhaps not in the literal sense but definitely at the cost of my own sanity. Sometimes I'm not sure where to turn. I guess the only reason I'm curious is because I don't know what else to do. It's a way to keep the mound preoccupied.

Though sometimes it's difficult to see if it's really the best thing for myself, I can only see so much into what I'm doing in order to evaluate myself. Others see far more clearly and well, I don't have others here to see this anymore. Sighs. I'm a lonely soul. It's going to be a long journey if I don't change my routine soon.

It's time for a change. Let's do this right!

...right after a nap.